


you smell like cigarettes and pizza

by zero



Series: NEET Cloud's Last Romance [1]
Category: Cuphead (Video Game), Final Fantasy 7
Genre: Emo, F/M, Medium Burn, Romance, Shipping, crackfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-17
Updated: 2019-05-17
Packaged: 2020-03-06 18:39:28
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,138
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18856807
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zero/pseuds/zero
Summary: cloud goes on a date with the prince of darkness





	you smell like cigarettes and pizza

cloud strife spends her days at home, full of vague yearning and going increasingly insane from isolation and loneliness. the devil appears to her in a dream and courts her vaguely by an elevator. the devil knows the corridors of dream. walk into my parlor said the spider to the fly, and i will show you how deep the rabbit hole goes. in her dream, clouds dream, the devil has a ride sharing app, a food delivery app, a whole conglomeration of apps. everything you pirate, every morsel of food you buy through the app contributes to your sin quotient. cloud had been living on borrowed time, in the dream, and she ubers to the mall and wanders around looking at the children, feeling sad and jealous, wishing she was young, missing the flower girl, missing tifa, missing everyone. where is she now? what has she become? those brief moments on the motorcycle, that hotel by the beach, those old, rotten, burned out towns. drifting in and out of another dream.

in this dream, a dream of hell, she envisions herself in corridors, in catwalks, stalked by the devil. she sees him in full shaggy satyr regalia, he is antagonistic, he teases, he taunts, he ridicules. his name is marc anthony, assassin of caesar. so naturally, from his food service app, she orders little caesars. the mans flesh made bread and the sunlight of his beautiful countenance made cheese, made crust, made crazy bread, made pepperoni. and he whom eateth of my flesh shall have life eternal -JC (thats, julius caesar)

cloud strife wakes up from her dream of the devil dragging her to hell in an elevator and she says yes, i will, i will go to hell in that elevator, for who knows what jewels and riches are to be found in hell. upon waking she sees the devil is there and he is full of shaggy black hair, and life and vitality. he is a pan in the mood. and he courts her and talks to her.

devil: hi... sorry, did i wake you  
cloud: im so afraid. are you really him? have you come for my soul?  
devil: no. im just lonely. im so alone  
cloud: i know how you feel  
cloud: would you like a friend  
devil: thats such a weird thing to ask someone when you dont know them. but yeah, i would  
cloud: im thirsty. i should, uh, go get something to drink  
devil: wanna go on a run  
devil: "south of the border"  
devil: to uh  
devil: circle k  
cloud: normally that actually means taco bell, but sure  
cloud: sometimes a coca cola is all you need  
devil: they have these taco chips that are alright

so they went. its not a very long drive. its within walking distance, even. cloud is still nervous and she adjusts the hem of her skirt and tugs at her stockings. the devil is wearing a shabby suit because he is a gentleman, but no tie or anything like that. just kind of a blazer.

he rolls down the windows as they go. some night!

and they look at the crickets in the desert. a dead mouse languishes on the side of the road. there are moths in the garbage. there are ants on the ground. wild pigs run and feed off the dying men. it has cooled down. its 3 am since she had the dream.

cloud: you hear about that new mario maker game  
devil: what makes you think i play video games, heheh  
cloud: *blushing* nothing! i just saw the direct recently and was wondering if you cared at all  
devil: you know, lately ive mostly been playing old n64 and ps1 games.  
devil: i got a good deal down at goodwill, haha  
cloud: we should do kirby 64 multiplayer sometime  
cloud: the apple minigame  
devil: uh... maybe when we know each other better  
devil: so is this a date  
cloud: *TENSES UP* UH  
devil: haha, only messing with you.  
cloud: no... i mean, it can be, if you want it to be.  
cloud: ive just been really depressed lately

passing by a cactus. passing by a dry riverbed. its supposed to only be a mile but it feels so much longer.

big bright "K" in the distance like the red sun of krypton. shining like a shiny demon on the side of the road. strange gamblers doing what they do in the pale moonlight. the devil is a gambler, too, and he knows what is what and how to feel and how to be. but hes so strange and eldritch and hes not of this world, and he smells like tobacco and brimstone and opiate addiction, and hes reeling and thinking and full of a squirming brain with limitless designs and machinations. hes not evil anymore than society is evil. he just looks her in the eyes, and there are sparks, and there is a wildfire. but hes too hard to know. she turns away, her eyes closed to the fact of satanic hedonism, his eyes closed to the fact of terrestrial honor.

cloud: do you like mountain dew voltage  
devil: my new hotness is monster energy espresso  
devil: "bottoms up and the devil laughs," haha  
cloud: ill try one i guess, alongside the coke  
devil: they probably dont mix  
cloud: im getting hot pockets  
devil: omg  
cloud: lets also get a tuna sandwich and some 4lokos. i cant do this sober. its too weird  
devil, *quietly*: do you frequently wear a skirt in public  
cloud: i usually order my groceries because im agoraphobic.  
devil: that explains why youve been using my postmates app  
cloud: i dont like to think about it as "your app." its just a program on my phone *checks her phone*  
cloud: (internally: i should stop doing that)  
cloud: *puts her phone away

later they are outside on a bench and they are looking at the stars. she gives him the sideye, as if to say, "want to hold hands" the devil has a weird dark hand thats padded and leathern. he has hooves like always. he has strange claws and a strange gleam in his wide, sunken eyes

cloud: your horns are very beautiful  
devil: please dont say things like that. its rude to me  
cloud: (ah fuck... i offended him)  
cloud: yeah. you smell like cigarette smoke  
devil: you want to burn one?  
cloud: im on hrt  
devil: i mean, i should have assumed  
devil: i dont know any constellations, but the stars are sure beautiful

she grabs his hand and moves her fingers along his shaggy fingers

cloud: you know, back when we used to hit the gold saucer, i was never very good at the basketball minigame  
cloud: i didnt like to... gamble  
cloud: but tonight...  
cloud: tonight i sure feel lucky


End file.
